Day 6...Full time or Part time

Day 6...Full time or Part time

If only this venture could be labelled a part time occupation! 

Six years ago, when moving to the mountains, I was determined to live life in the 3rd gear. I wanted lots of time to go for long walks with the dogs, sit on sunlit hill slopes and read the newspaper/ books, or just stare at the mountains and pine trees. After decades of juggling multiple roles, I had this feeling that it was time to pamper myself and take it easy. We are so conditioned to believe that we are doing something extraordinary if we are pursuing a career, bringing up children, nurturing bonds of friendship and family, and all the other things which millions of women do, all over the world. I was no exception and had come to believe that working part time would make me content and serenely happy.

Today, I just have to laugh indulgently at that naive me. Needlestosaymore occupies every moment of my day, every nook and corner of my mind, and almost every page of my bullet journal. And I am  content and serenely happy.

I have realised that working on a project which involves a skill I love ( knitting), people who love the skill as much as I do ( the knitters), in a place which is comfortable and well organised ( home), and which produces things make me proud ( our line of knitwear), then it can never be a part time venture. Its more like 24 part time jobs stuffed into every day of the year.

Many hours are allotted  to test knitting, to reading blogs and books which hold tips and techniques we can use, to making charts and instruction sheets in Hindi… a passing bit of applause for that girl who would barely scrape through her Hindi exams, who would be teased mercilessly in college for mixing up genders of tables and chairs (still a mystery), and who believed that Hindi could never be learnt.

Many days are spent in remorse, for not updating the website regularly/ being erratic on social media/wasting hours on and slinking past promising marketing opportunities..

Its only recently that I have begun to accept myself for what I am , and be where I am. Inspite of  past resolutions to work part time merging into full time work, inspite of exhausting days and nights of wishing I had done a little more productive work, I am content.

And choosing to find contentment in all the ups and downs of this small business…Now that  is a full time business!

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